Monday, April 28, 2014

Cucumber Doritos

Mind. Blown. Yup, this happened. Set your oven to 350 and slice a cucumber super thin. Layer on a foil covered cookie sheet. Spray with cooking spray. Sprinkle on 0 calorie nacho cheese popcorn salt (the kind I used is pictured below- we found it in Kentucky). The one side is nacho cheese and the other side is garlic. Bake for 15 min and enjoy! Doritors are J's fave and since we are deep into prep, I made these for him over the weekend for a sanity check 

Friday, April 25, 2014

Reasons You Aren't Succeeding. Spoiler Alert- It's Not Your Coach's Fault

I have been getting EXTREMELY annoyed lately with the constant "I'm not seeing the results I want" emails followed with "I'm not committed to my plan 100% but I'm trying".

That's bullshit. Sorry but this blog post won't have anything sugar coated in it because honestly, you would probably eat that too.

If you have hired someone to help you through your fitness, or any goals for that matter, you should probably listen to them since what you've been doing clearly hasn't yielded the results you want.

Here are some reasons you probably aren't succeeding:

1- you're not pushing yourself at the gym
2- you're not committed to your diet
3- you're having a ton of cheat meals a week
4- you're not following your meal plan to a T
5- you're not sleeping enough
6- you're not drinking enough water
7- you're drinking something other than water or unsweetened green tea
8- you're eating fruit- young grasshoppers, that will be the next blog post so keep your panties on
9- you're playing the pity party game for yourself
10- you're making excuses i.e.: i travel for work, i'm a mom, etc (news flash, i'm writing this blog post in the car while J drives through the mountains of kentucky while we are turkey hunting. so no, you don't have an excuse to not put in the work).
11- you're not measuring your food. a TBSP of peanut butter is really fucking small and pathetic when you actually measure it
12- you're adding things to your plan that aren't on your plan, i.e.: adding a little sour cream to your fish or adding a few handful of nuts here and there to snack on
14- you're not lifting heavy enough. you should be lifting heavy enough to finish your reps but STRUGGLE to finish the last 20%
15- you're lifting with improper form
16- you're not committed to your diet
17- you're not meal prepping
18- you're not committed to your diet- yes i've typed that three times. hoping to smack some people in the face
19- you're not taking your supplements
20- you're taking generic shitty supplements and not following the supplement plan your coach provided because you wanted to be cheap. guess what- your body isn't something to be careless about. pay the extra money

$150 to the first troll to comment on my Instagram page to tell me i missed a #13

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Started From The Bottom

So lately I have been receiving a ton of emails asking how I got started in this industry. While extremely flattered, I can't help but wonder why me- is it because of my followers on Instagram or because of my hilarious wit on my blog- I would like to think the latter.

My professional education is in marketing. My undergrad and marketing (both from Ball State), were in marketing. Yes, I graduated with my MBA at the age of 22. Yes, I received my undergrad in 3 years. Yes, I worked my ass off during college. Guess what- they all laughed while I worked. Now I laugh while they work (just kidding, kind of, not really).

So, my MBA was in marketing. Now what the hell do I do???!?!? Ahh job! Well good thing for me, I network really well and I received a job at a digital marketing agency the day after I graduated with my MBA. Picture perfect- right. It was. I worked there for 2 1/2 years. During this time as an account manager, I worked on some very large digital marketing projects for clients such as Menards, HGTV, Owens Corning, etc (when I say big projects, I mean apps that cost over $1,000,000).

During my big-girl-cubicle job, I learned a lot about the digital space and what it takes to market a brand and yourself in the social world. During this time, I began to build my own name and my own brand via instagram. I simply started posting things that had value (i.e: recipes, workouts, etc). And then I started competing and was submerged in the world of bodybuilding. Fast forward through 6 shows in one year and voila- we are in September 2014.

I really wanted to make sure that I came out of my show season in the healthiest way possible so I started researching fitness nutrition certifications. I then became certified through ISSA in fitness nutrition. This opened up a world of opportunity for me to begin to help people in their fitness journey. And then came the sponsors. I was PROACTIVE in reaching out to companies who I wanted to partner with to promote products. I WROTE LETTERS to these companies that I believed in. I WORKED for the sponsorships that I received.

Off season. Bulking. Woof. I put on 20 pounds in the off season between end of September through beginning of February. I overcame by binge/starve routine I was putting myself through. I was sponsored by amazing companies. And most importantly, I was helping hundreds of clients.

I then was offered the opportunity to work at The Arnold Sports Festival in Columbus, OH at the end of February- stoked? Stoked doesn't even begin to f***ing describe how excited I was. Three days of promoting my first sponsor, Isolator Fitness, and being surrounded by those who shared my dreams and passion- yes please.

Saturday night of the Arnold, all I wanted to do was lift some weights. That's all. There was literally one gym open late enough for me to workout at in Columbus- Lifetime. Headphones in, world off- or so I thought. Mid-glute thrusting workout, I hear a voice "hey, did you compete at the Arnold", ughhhh go away guy- I'm just trying to workout. And then I saw him. And it changed. An instant worlds-colliding-WTF moment happened. We talked about everything, just standing there at the gym sipping BCAAs and talking about dreams and goals.

Fast forward about 14 hours and I'm back working the Arnold booth. And he shows up. And fast forward two weeks. I was offered a marketing position in Columbus that I had been wanting for forever. I quit my job in Toledo, moved to Columbus, and realized I couldn't sit at a desk the rest of my life. I refuse. So,  I turned the offer down. And today is my official start of my third week being self-employed. It has taught me how driven and determined my business mind fully is. Oh and that boy? We are dating. And it's something so much more than boyfriend/girlfriend. We are a team and we both get to build this empire together.

Just remember- there is no shortcut to any place worth going. So work hard and put in your time.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Things That Annoy me on Instagram

Ok, so how is this for a rant session.

There are so many things that have been annoying me on Instagram lately so I thought I would share them all with you.

1- what is up with all of the "meal prep" people out there. are you even certified? y'all realize it's ILLEGAL to sell meal/prep plans without being certified right?
2- all of these supplement companies that are popping up out of nowhere. i'm just glad i'm affiliated with companies that actually have science behind their products...
3- trolls. seriously- if you don't have anything nice to say, just stop following me. it gets really annoying when i see posts asking how big my penis is. it's bigger than yours, clearly.
4- when people post pictures of food and tell their viewers they have to buy their Ebook. are you out of your damn mind. RUDE
5- every picture that isn't a cat really pisses me off
6- your ass picture. ladies, if you only have 200k + followers because every other post is of you in your thong, you may want to re-evaluate. no one takes you seriously. seriously.
7- more trolls
8- "broscience"
9- when people  don't read the captions i type
10- when people don't watch the videos i post

Life Update

I have been posting a lot of recipes lately without posting a life update. I haven't had the mental capacity to process or fathom the path in which my life has taken me in the past 6-7 weeks. In the past month and a half, I quit my job, moved to Columbus, was offered a new job, turned down said new job, and embarked on a whole new career path: building my own fitness brand and meal plan consultations. It's my passion and life is too short to be hired to build someone else's dream when you could be building your own.

For the past ten days, I have been my own boss. I have made my own schedule. And I have made more money in the past ten days working for myself than I was making in 6 weeks at my desk job. I have the freedom to do what I want, when I want, and still have the discipline to work harder than I ever have in my life.

Is this path something everyone can do? Yes. If you truly believe in yourself and the passion in your heart. Does it take a lot of work? Hell yea it takes a lot of work. It's the same way I got my MBA in 11 months and my undergrad in 3 years. I was working when everyone else was playing. And look what I get to do now, play while everyone else is working. My MBA and undergrad in marketing allowed me to learn HOW to promote myself, my brand, and my companies. My fitness nutrition certification has allowed to market and build my consultation company into something I never would have imagined.

There are people who come into our lives that awaken different beasts within us. I was ready to take this leap of faith but needed someone to help me off the ledge. I found that person to help me. And what's even more incredible is that now that we are a team, we are literally building an empire. Changing the fitness and health industry daily. Learning more day by day as to how our bodies work, the foods and nutrients that we need, and different training techniques. Be unstoppable.

On top of my own companies and brand, I am also working with and writing for them as well as working with the online coaching segment of Team VIP. We are also working on more sponsorships and partnerships (look at SOON for those details) and we are also in R&D with two new fitness related products with a company down in Miami (one food related product and one tracking related product). On top of ALL of that, we have shows coming up! We are both 2 1/2 weeks out from Pittsburgh, doing two a days, and prepping meal like it's our job- well technically it is.

Another passion of mine that I have recently been introduced to is archery. Turkey season starts on Monday and before I post this on Instagram, yes, I will be hunting birds. Please understand that I am a pescatarian- yes. I do NOT eat land animals because I do not believe in the hormones, steroids, and meat packing industry that goes into processing farm animals for human consumption. That being said, there is something extremely primitive about hunting meat yourself. Please understand, I am the biggest animal lover in the world but if animal populations aren't regulated (i.e. turkeys, deer, etc), diseases will spread and over population will occur. If you choose to unfollow me or not like me because of this then I understand- but please be considerate of my point as well.

Oh yea, and look out for updated meals, diets, cardio, lifting, and supplement plans! And look out for my new logo too!!

Go the extra mile. It's never crowded.

Saturday, April 5, 2014

Alcohol is Spelled Poison

Alcohol. Beer. Liquor. Liquid Courage.

It's literally all poison to our bodies. Don't believe me? Keep reading.

Your body treats alcohol like a poison because that's what it is. It's something that it doesn't want inside of you. To fight it off and to sober up, your body releases an enzyme called alcohol dehydrogenase.

This enzyme will snatch a hydrogen atom off the alcohol molecules in whatever $1.50 car bomb you just slammed with your friends and will render in into a non-intoxicating acetaldehyde. Great right? Except more often than not, you're slamming shots and drinking quicker than your body can produce this powerful enzyme.

So what happens to all the alcohol that your body actually absorbs? Well for starters, it will inhibit your brain cells. Not like you have much concern for your brain if you are drinking copious amounts but here's the scoop: alcohol affects the way your neurons get their firing triggers from glutamate. Alcohol interferes with the glutamate receptors in your dome piece and hurts their ability to send off the normal "fire" messages. This impacts every single action across your brain: muscles, speech, coordination, judgement, classiness, and so on

So why can you never remember being such a dumbass when you drink? The way your brain makes memories is so complex that even Bill Nye struggles with it, and he's a science guy. Memories are, however, linked to NMDA. Alcohol interferes with this receptor. So good luck remembering dancing on the bar with the lampshade on your head.

Why do you throw up when you've had too much alcohol? HELLO?!?!?! Has your body ever rejected avocado and tuna? Unless you're allergic, smartasses, the answer is no. Why do you get hangovers? Because your body was literally up all night trying to repel and correct the poison that you put in it.

I have been sober since February 2012 and don't plan on ever drinking again. I just tell people I'm allergic since very few people can wrap their heads around the fact that I don't want to poison my body.

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Protein Cookie Sandwiches

Protein cookie sandwiches

In a blender, blend:
1/8 cup oats until it's a flour. 

Add 1 TBSP coconut flour, 1/2 TSBP coconut oil, 1 muscle egg vanilla egg white (3 TBSP), 3 TBSP almond milk, and 1 scoop cellucor vanilla protein powder. On a sprayed cookie sheet, plop six dough balls on the sheet. Bake for 9 at 350. While that's baking, mix 1/2 scoop cellucor cor-fetti protein powder with enough water to make a paste and use this as your filling. Macros for the whole recipe (yields 3): 358 calories, 11 fat, 11 net carbs, 44 grams of protein.